Monday, March 16, 2015

Strike 12 or so on Spring Break

I had a doozy of a day today(the horrible, no good, very bad kind). The stories I am about to tell you are in no way an attempt to elicit sympathy but hopefully an opportunity for you to laugh or commiserate with me.

The first day of spring break started with a yawn as I had been up most the night with Grayson and Matalley complaining of sore throats, tummy aches and ear aches. My first morning ‘to-do’ was to contact the doctor for appointments. While waiting for the 8:30 office opening, I decided to work on the school yearbook that I inadvertently agreed to create. Really it’s 8:29 (and a few seconds) office opening because if you wait until 8:30, you get a busy signal until at least 8:50 and that can set you back to 2 o’clock for a sick visit….no way I could wait until then with the complaining and the neediness of relief. So I watch the clock with an abnormal ticking of the head, waiting for the exact minute I can press ‘talk’ on my phone.
In my haste of editing school pictures, I deleted a few kids. A quick call to the yearbook company reloaded the program so now instead of just moving a few pictures, I’m having to approve (one by one) each school picture for the book, including retakes. A big job now just got that much bigger…woohoo (said in flat tone). If I had been thinking, I should have assumed that if any of the Moms of those missing kids throw a fit, I can just hand over the yearbook to them to do next year…that would have been brilliant. It was at that point that Millie decided to smash a bottle of nail polish over the tile floor splattering pink polish up the wall, cabinet, rug and herself. She is in that stage where she grabs something from one room, takes it to the other and drops it and picks up something else and you are basically on a scavenger hunt the entire day putting things back into place. The nail polish was an added bonus because it took me 20 extra minutes to clean it all up so I was that much further behind in the “scavenger hunt.” I debated if I had time for a shower before the doctor appointments and decided it was worth the risk. A recent Mom report card had my kids giving me an ‘F’ in the “Does your parent teach you the importance of being on time?” question, but I really deemed the shower necessary after my night of holding sickies. After getting ready, it was time to get Millie ready…diapers are really only good 10-12 hours and I was pushing 15 which could explain the slight rash that is developing. Too bad it doesn’t slow her down in scavenger hunt mode. I got her all dressed and walked over to the other kids to verify that all shoes and clothes were on appropriately. Lola needed a redo which gave Millie exactly enough time to undress completely. On my way out the door, I grabbed a pacifier from the cabinet (just in case baby girl decided to take a nap) and knocked over a baby food jar of green peas. Glass and green goo splattered everywhere. I left most of the goo but had to grab the glass in case the deaf and blind Deaky dog came across a good smell of peas and licked it all down without bypassing the glass. So much for being on time to the doctor…who cares if I get an F in timeliness?
Filing all 5 of us into the exam room and maintaining sanity is in itself a process. Those rooms echo like a big ol’ cavern offering no hope of escape. It’s after we get in the room that I discover green pea splatter in my hair and up my back…what a lovely picture for the receptionist. The check-up revealed not just an ear infection, but a ruptured ear-drum for Grayson and 2 cases of strep throat. We were given 3 prescriptions for antibiotics (might as well start Lola on it because she’s likely to get strep anyway…thank goodness Millie is acting fine). Then file us all out, pay our bill and head to the grocery store for the antibiotics, new toothbrushes and some comfort food. I leave Grayson at the pharmacy to sleep in a waiting chair…he can barely stand up, while rushing through the aisles grabbing toothbrushes, Gatorade, soup, nail polish remover (Millie cleaned me out), crackers, cabbage (it’s St. Patty’s day tomorrow) and anything else Millie screams for. We swing back by for the meds (which despite insurance, cost WAY too much) and Grayson and head to check out. I like long lines and slow grocery baggers. They teach me so much about patience and remaining calm. On the way home, I call Matt to apologize for not meeting him for lunch. He kindly explains that he was too busy to even think about eating. Turns out a pseudo Sadler filed our tax return for us using my social security number and may be enjoying a nice refund right now. Matt was on the phone to the IRS thru lunch so I don’t have to worry about being a no show! Sadly, the indoor water park and hotel we have reservations for tomorrow are non-refundable and since my ruptured ear-drum kid can’t swim until he’s healed, vacation may be especially sad for him. I have a few minutes to deal with the gas company and a double bill charge, the health insurance bill, and more coddling of the sickies before hitting my wits’ end for the day. It’s all requiring more patience than I can muster.
Our first day of spring break plans for the discovery center and lunch with Dad are long out the window but there is still some hope of redeeming the day. I can have lunch ready by 2, get everyone the first round of antibiotics and manage a load of laundry, including green pea washcloths (said in my head with a twinge of irony).
I want to go on a LONG vacation from any and every responsibility (really that is a thought that pops into my mind at least once a day as I contemplate how far I could get before anyone would notice I was missing. It’s not that far; hiding out in the garage only buys me 10 minutes on average). I’m sure you have your own stories today…I can’t be the only one that has ever had green pea goo down her backside. What are you wanting a vacation from?
And then I look at pictures of these cuties and can't imagine wanting a vacation from them.



 

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