Unrealistic Wishes

So after sleeping on it, I think my kids are more like me than I realized.  I too have a long list of unrealistic gift wishes.  I thought about that as I was sitting in my car with the garage door down while the kids were inside.  I was crying because my belly prevented me from reaching the far corner of the back seat of the van where Matalley had an accident (I cry over lots of things these days...not to say I wasn't a crier before, my nickname is weepee after all). 

Yesterday I tried to run a few errands with the kids after picking Grayson up at school.  I'm the homeroom mom for his class and today is his teacher's birthday.  I realize that I should have done it while the older 2 were in school, but I had a work meeting for Roots and Wings (the banquet I get to do every year) and we ran out of time.  So, I thought it couldn't possibly take more than 15 minutes to swing by the cupcakery for a cupcake and then by her favorite nail salon for a gift certificate from the class.  15 minutes later, I was still in the left hand turn lane waiting for the light to turn green.  Apparently the hectic season is upon us where everyone is driving like a maniac to get some shopping done and it was rush hour early.  Anyway, we made it to the cupcakery and I told the kids to stay in the van. When I got back out, Matalley was standing with her legs spread apart and crying.  She said, "I thought you'd be mad if I got out of the van."  And I said, "No more mad than I am now that I have to clean up urine from the back of the van!...and a few other words."  So arriving home 50 minutes later than we should have, I gave Matalley a bath, tried to clean the van, started some laundry, looked around at the messes everywhere and felt sorry for myself.

I was wishing desperately for someone to take at least one dog away(Abbey ran away while I was cleaning the van...it's almost a daily occurrence and a big pain in the rear.  Our neighbors usually return her and appear to want a reward but really I just want her to stay away forever so they are not doing me any favors. There is also an onslaught of  dog hair everywhere that requires daily vacuuming.  And finally, there is Abbey's fear of noise so that when the kids are home, she just hovers at my feet trying to trip me and wailing when I accidentally step on her.). I was also wishing for someone to deep clean my van and my home, removing every sticky substance from the handles of the refrigerator and bottom of the sideboards and tops of every piece of furniture. Picking up the empty marker caps, half used kleenex's and tiny lego pieces.  I would also like one of those Jetson laundry rooms that wash, fold, and put away clothes.  Half the time, the dirty clothes are anywhere but the laundry bin and then once I've cleaned and folded a load (I do at least one load a day), somehow the clean clothes wind up right next to the dirty clothes so that you really don't know what is actually dirty unless you smell it and who wants to do that?

So after my little pity party, I started feeling worse about myself knowing that there are starving kids in Africa, children in my neighborhood that are abused, families that are missing parents or watching a child get sicker and I know that I am REALLY lucky and shouldn't be complaining about smelly feet and half filled drinking cups.  I thought about how whipped I felt after an afternoon with just the three of them and panic set in that in one month I'll have 4 and how the heck am I going to manage that?!?!  I was wiped and although I'm sure I could have fixed mac n' cheese from a box or got out some sandwich bread, I just wasn't up to it.  So Matt arrived home and for the first time in our 13 years of marriage, I opened up the cereal cabinet and said "dinner is served."  Matt offered to go get something or order pizza and I said, "none of us earned it today."  It actually ended up being a good experience...the kids were shocked and a little confused.  They still managed to make a mess drinking the milk out of the cereal bowls...straws fling milk droplets in places you think are too far away to be reached.  Tonight Matalley told Matt, "I know we were good today because she made us dinner."  I don't know that cereal night will happen again, but I'm not ruling it out.  There are bound to be other days like yesterday and unrealistic expectations.  I know that however farfetched my kids' Santa requests seem to me, my own requests are even more insane.